EMF Flies Solo


Mbulsht is away this weekend, and will be away next weekend as well. This, of course, means I have to fly solo for a while. Anyway, let’s get off on the right foot and review our fanfiction.



Our story is called ‘Reality is Twisted’, written by epicdonus1123. Contrary to what you might think from the title, this fanfic is not a sci-fi epic with heavy reliance on warping the (dumb) fabric of time and space. Instead, it revolves around one Rainbow Dash and her pet chicken Scoot-a-doodle-doo. One day, Rainbow Dash starts to feel pangs of sympathy for our friendly neighbourhood orphan, currently living in the cliché cardboard box in the cliché alleyway. So she adopts her. The rest is just one big bundle of d’awwwww.



Analysing this fanfic, to be honest, doesn’t take much effort. The premise, while maybe a little unoriginal, is still a great premise. The execution, however, is a tad lacking. The author makes up the ages of Rainbow Dash and Scootaloo, invents a creative enough backstory for Scootaloo and how she became an orphan, and comes up with good general ideas. These are really the only parts of the fanfiction that can’t be criticized. To kick off the flaws section in the words of commenter JJtheWarrior:

“Once upon a time, Celestia and epicdonus were in a race. epicdonus won by a long shot, but while the race was still going on, Celestia shouted 'SLOW THE BUCK DOWN,' all slow motion like. The moral of this story is.... slow down if you are going to write more.”

The pacing is so fast that even the shazbot from Tribes Ascend would struggle to keep up. There is a distinct and noticeable lack of description throughout the fanfiction. The concept could have been toyed with more in additional chapters. Most of the characters are not their normal selves. The title could have been substituted for something better. Scootaloo’s uncle really needed to be expanded on. The grammar could definitely be improved upon. And so on and so forth.



So, ‘Reality is Twisted’. It’s a flawed fanfiction spawned from a promising prospect. It’s worth reading just for the general ideas that are thrown at the reader, but the execution leaves a lot to be desired. If the author rewrote it with more description and more chapters, it would be one to watch indeed. As it stands, though, it reaches slightly below decent tier.


Story: “Reality is Twisted”
Author: epicdonus1123
Genres: Sad, Slice of Life
Status: Complete
Length: 2 Chapters; 3,029 Words
Link: http://www.fimfiction.net/story/36794/Reality-is-Twisted

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EMF Scootaloo!G4/R19.jIE Mon, Jul 9th, 2012 09:29 No. 118 File 134185136409.png - (134.01KB , 894x894 , 912.png ) And I'm here again. ARGH, am I supposed to post this on the website, or do you do it? I'm not good with this kind of stuff, usually I just send this stuff to Mbul and he takes care of the rest. Reply  •  Report

>>	Anonymous Wed, Oct 10th, 2012 22:00 No. 154 File 134993165594.png - (25.96KB , 830x650 , myPony.png ) >>117 I can;t help but agree the fanfics of d'aww that start off with the generic box and what not since "my little dashie" was written have gone some what down hill. Reply  •  Report